Erwin Morales

Me and my younger cousins.

It’s the day college decisions come out. You are sitting down at your desk looking at the email, afraid to open it. “ I have to be accepted… I cant let anyone down.” Your heartbeat rises and you start to sweat right before you right-click twice.

All students have at one point felt the pressure of meeting certain expectations. Whether you need good grades to stay on the football team or to achieve your dream career there’s always a reason. For me, it’s family.

Of course, academics isn’t all it takes to be a good role model. I must also live a straight life without getting into any trouble. I must have integrity and be principled. I’m not saying I need to be perfect but I definitely need to live life as a role model they can look up to.

My mom, being the eldest of nine, had a lot of responsibility growing up. My grandparents worked tirelessly, so my mom had to support them by taking care of her siblings. As a result of this, my mom had to work hard and get good grades so that she could pave the way for the rest of her siblings. In other words, she had to be a great role model. I, like her, was born first, so naturally they passed her torch as a role model over to me.

Now that I have gotten older, I am beginning to understand the responsibilities I have as the eldest. Anytime I go to any sort of family reunion they always ask questions. “Have you applied to college yet? Have you been keeping up your grades? How’s school going?” I understand that they have high expectations, but I’m worried I might not be able to meet them.

Every time I take a test, I worry that I’m not going to meet expectations. Every time I study, I worry that I’m not going to meet expectations. Every time I see my family, I worry that I’m not going to meet expectations.

It’s not all bad though. Every time I succeed I know I’m inching a little closer to meeting everyone’s expectations. Every time I pass a test, meet with my cousins, and see the fruits of my practice, I feel that much more happy about my accomplishment.

The positive reinforcement your family gives you when you succeed is what gives me the courage to move forward no matter how worried I am about that test on Tuesday or how worried I am that I’m living life on the right path.

The fruits of my effort are already showing. When I got accepted into Carnegie, my mom was especially proud. She told all her friends about it. After spending two years at Carnegie and telling my younger cousin about it, it inspired her to apply and try to come to school at Carnegie just like me. By getting accepted into Carnegie I served as a role model for her and now she’s trying to do what I did.

The first time I saw the fruits of my efforts was when I was trying to get accepted at Carnegie. My mom wanted me to go to one of the top schools so she enrolled me in the GT test since I wasn’t classified GT beforehand. To my surprise, I passed and got accepted into Carnegie to top it off which made her very proud.

After getting into Carnegie I started to try more and it definitely showed results. In middle school, I was a B and C student, just barely scraping by. As soon as I got into Carnegie I decided I was gonna try my best and this definitely reflected my grades. I started receiving As and Bs. To top it all off, I even passed the AP exams for the classes that I was doing worse in.

Hopefully, I can do the same for college. I’m aiming for UT Austin. Hopefully, I get in and can continue striving to be a good role model. I am hoping to major in architecture or engineering so that I can take over my aunt’s business and maybe even start my own business.