Many people know Etsy as a site where online businesses can sell their products and goods. However, those goods aren’t limited to your everyday, physical item. Sometimes, they can be a bit more spiritually enhanced. After the announcement stating that Carnegie Vanguard High School would be removing the history course 1968/World Wars, many students were left wondering what exactly would be introduced in place of it. The school is introducing a new “Etsy Witch Training” course, planned to be launched and accepted as a 5.0 course for all grades coming the 2026-2027 school year.
“We believe that this course is essential for the kids of our time to be ready for the workforce,” a CVHS teacher said. “You never know what’s out there, so you always have to be prepared.”
Following the recent trend for people to pay Etsy witches to hex their enemies or help them find their true love, there has been a sharp increase in demand for Etsy witches.
“Because of this demand, we’ve decided to add the course to give our scholars a basic understanding of how curses and hexes work,” CVHS administration said. “We want our students to be able to feel prepared for any course of life they take.”
Furthermore, many colleges and universities have started offering similar, “fresher” courses for students who are looking into a more specialized field of study, such as “Underwater Basket Weaving”. With these new courses, teachers and staff alike hope that the information retained by students will allow them more job opportunities in the near future. “Underwater Basket Weaving saved my resume,” a CVHS alum says. “I’ve gotten so many more job and internship offers from it.”
Etsy Witch Training, at its core, is to help students learn basic skills and techniques used by Etsy witches regularly. However, it also provides a deep dive into the history behind the Etsy Witches.
“I wish I could’ve taken Etsy Witch Training when I was in high school,” a college senior says. “It would’ve helped tremendously because I’m majoring in Witchcraft & Sorcery.”
Despite this change, many students are still confused about the removal of 1968/World Wars as a class. “I mean, I really like Etsy Witch Training, don’t get me wrong. I just miss 1968.” CVHS junior says. However, no complaints have been made to the school, so CVHS hasn’t released an official statement about this change aside from the announcement of 1968/World Wars removal.
Many parents believe that Etsy Witch Training is beneficial for their students attending CVHS, however they are somewhat concerned about the material that they will be learning. “My kid is coming home and telling me that they’ve been cursing at people,” A CVHS parent states. “Is this really a part of the curriculum?” Despite these concerns, this CVHS parent believes that Etsy Witch Training is something that their child will absolutely need once they join the workforce.
Because of the amount of students who selected Etsy Witch Training for their course plans next year, CVHS has decided to add two new teachers who are specialized in Etsy Witchery: Ms. I’lovemagic and Mr. Magicspell. Mr. Magicspell will be teaching Etsy Witch Training for 6 out 7 periods of the day, while Ms. I’lovemagic will be teaching 3 periods of Etsy Witch Training. “I have a PhD in Witchcraft and Wizardry, so I’ve been mastering this topic for a while now.” Mr. Magicspell states. “I hope all Carnegie scholars are excited for this new opportunity, because I know I am.”
Additionally, many other CVHS teachers expressed their excitement for Etsy Witch Training as a course. “I’m thinking of getting Mr. Magicspell to let me sit in on one of his classes during my planning period,” CVHS teacher says. “I’ve never heard of an Etsy before, so I’m interested in what the curriculum would look like and how he teaches.” Additionally, Mr. Magicspell will be staying before and after school hours to answer any student questions or tutor them in the Etsy Witch curriculum.
As a class, Etsy Witch Training may seem like it doesn’t do much. In CVHS, there is still a portion of the school’s population and parents that believe this. “I don’t care for hexing or casting spells,” a CVHS student states. “It seems so redundant. Why would I want to do that? It sounds dumb.” A CVHS parent agrees with this claim, stating: “I don’t want my child to partake in this tomfoolery. This is an abomination and it has no place in this school.”
Despite these claims, it seems that Etsy Witch Training has been largely well-received in CVHS. So much so that HISD has recognized its potential and has started to introduce new Etsy Witch Training classes in other HISD schools. Perhaps soon, Etsy Witches will be located all throughout the Greater Houston area.
